AGHHHH, ADAM: HOLD ON ONE DAMN MINUTE! It bridged the cultural gap between the cult movie and the studio movie, making a genre-movie quirkiness acceptable to the mainstream." New York Times film critic Glenn Kenny 3 And he's to blame. Now, lets get you processed. Everything was the way it used to be. BARBARA: Were just a normal couple. Lydia: i can't change anything. OH! And I'm just Hamlet going insane. Welcome! So goodbye . If this house is haunted, then that means mom might still be back at our old house! Does this couch make me look dead? But heres the good news! I realized that I dont want to go through life alone. I didnt like strangers when I was alive. BUT BEETLEJUICE, IT'S NOT AS IF I'VE LOST MY MIND. Im gonna find my mom! OH! And Lydia, I think Ill miss you most of all. GIRL SCOUT: Okay Well- Maybe I should come back another time when your parents are home? April 25, 2019. New meat! Promise me we can talk about her. You both get em. You give mea bonerhere, its a femur. ADAM: Wed love it! Where are you? Beetlejuice is ruder, raunchier and frankly, more repellent than ever in this original musical based on Tim Burton's wonderfully demented film. MAXIE DEAN: I was never gonna invest in your stupid "gated community." BEETLEJUICE See, this is what life is. I'LL MAKE THE BEST OF BEING FLESH AND BONE, BEETLEJUICE: Thats right! (chuckling.) The late '80s cartoon of the same name makes Beetlejuice and Lydia best friends, not maybe-lovers, and the Broadway musical made a big effort to modernize the story: It does keep the "I'm . Do you remember what I said? In a haunted house, all alone! BEETLEJUICE: Nice moves Lydia! LYDIA: But Dad, theres no one in it. Let me point you to the right page. Maybe, we can help each other! CHARLES: Oh yes, Lydia, she uh, Im afraid she wont be joining us. No he wont, youll just be dead. Im so scared Im going to forget her. This is already the BEST exorcism Ive ever been to! do not like him! Fuck Brigadoon. LYDIA: I cant open it. STOREROOM - DAY Adam puts away the tape but keeps on humming the song. JUNO: I shouldve guessed youd be mixed up in all of this! CHARLES: Where is the shrimp? BARBARA: Ill make a (a beat.) Oh my god! Its the perfect weapon to help you vanquish your ghost. Death for the dead. Beetlejuice is a musical with music and lyrics by Eddie Perfect and book by Scott Brown and Anthony King. BEETLEJUICE: Uh, wait what? Look at you. ), BARBARA: MAITLANDS 2.0! close. God, youre a screw up! (a beat.) I meant to say. OTHO: Let me say it (dramatically) DEATH! All you gotta do is say my name. BEETLEJUICE: Get in there Babs! You see Charles, as a life coach, I have but one enemy. And you heard what he said, any ghost can do that possession stuff. Up the stairs! Whatd you do!? Were going to change that (rings triangle.) LYDIA: Dead Mom? Pluslearn to throw your voice! Unless, are you horribly disfigured? Its the one room in the house thats still ours! The two of you need to hire me right now. Theyre the real villains of this show. Every bit of it. Dont you remember when we moved in? And then, spring the trap. Beetlejuice truly hits me in a special part of my heart. Use their user talk pages. I changed a lot. L: I'm Lydia Deetz and I'm of sound mind. ADAM: Oh god! So, goodbye. So mean. Eddie Perfect, Lydia is a dark, yet exceedingly smart young woman. It's not about that. Im bringing my mom back! It sayswe should draw a door. Smash. Okay, new plan. DELIA: AH! Both movie and musical have the same bones, yet there are many differences that change everything from minor details to major motivations. Suggested Audition Pieces Auditioning for Lydia? LYDIA: Well, Im not going with them! BEETLEJUICE: Well, it doesnt matter if you say it Adam, THEY HAVE TO BE ALIVE! Lydia, right now you are redirecting anger and deflecting pain and other terms I learned in my training. WHY DO YOU POLISH YOUR CRIB WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE A KID? See ya suckers! Our countdown includes scenes from "Beetlejuice", "School Daze", "Grease 2" and more! Adorable! This was an excuse to make the boys interact and realize they all are wife simps. Which does not come easy. Im so glad you could make it! BARBARA: WE'LL RATTLE CHAINS AND I DON'T KNOW! She scratches that out. The production is scheduled to close on June 6 . CHARLES: -Not good for Lydia. BEETLEJUICE: (sinisterly.) BEETLEJUICE: YouareADORABLE (kisses Adam) HA! We got any kids in the audience? This is all very believable. Club members can see a different show every night of the week! BEETLEJUICE: Ugh, holy moly, a lot of people come to this house, lights! Are you all right? And I think Ill take a chance on life! MAXIE DEAN: Chuck, you moron! I am angry! ADAM: I didnt think it was that weak! And now were all alone. Thats your answer for everything! YAAAH. Right now, just outside the walls of this house, nestled in the hatch back of my Toyota Prius, is a mysterious object of my own design. 2."Well, I've read through that handbook for the recently deceased. Youre leaving me? Dad, please. BEETLEJUICE: Hi there, ahahaha! I'm on the bench, but coach. I am positive I quoted my guru Otho who said Sadness is like kale salad. However, we have dozens of other monologues that you can read. Leave this house! My dad never wants me to talk about her. LYDIA: Youre scared of everything! LYDIA: Greetings, ghosts. Beetlejuice : I'm Lydia Deetz and I'm of sound mind. ADAM: That guy! (Charles and Delia try a Hi-five) Oh, so close! Dont you wanna get these people out of your house? Weve already said it a bunch of times! ADAM: Okay, that Wasn't as much fun as I thought it'd be ADAM: We are not kombucha people. BEETLEJUICE: Well make it snappy, I WANT CAKE! BEETLEJUICE: Well, yeah, because youre not recently deceased. MISS ARGENTINA: But thats impossible, you youre a living girl. Im not sure youre equipped. The ghost-with-the-most comes to the stage in this edgy and irreverent musical comedy based on Tim Burton's dearly beloved film. Because of her, I got to live, briefly, very briefly, and can I just say something? ADAM: Oh yeah? CHARLES: Delia, you erotic astronaut! Yes, I love that man of mine. what Im trying to say is; I hired you to help my daughter, but you have ended up helping me. Its like a green card thing! Take care of them. Start reading. This is the first nice moment Ive had since I got here. I wanna go home. You asked me, I'm answering. In the video, Baldwin recalls the one thing that gave him hope about the film was the performance of his co-star, Michael Keaton, whom he describes as a "comedy Annie Oakley.". *attempts to jump again. LYDIA: Shade Maternal, Fate Infernal, I summon thee with Saturns breath. ANY GHOST CAN DO THAT IN LESS THAN ONE LESSON. You said no Ink Spots on this vacation! BEETLEJUICE: Back off, Mom! . All ganging up against the mean lady from hell! Do you want some lunch? BEETLEJUICE: Wow! Theyre chasing me! I, myself, am strange and unusual." -Lydia Deetz. Mr. Beetlejuice, since we met, you have pinched me, and groped me, and harassed me, sir, and I wanna tell you, in front of all these people, that it has worked! Classic Bait and Switch. Get the shrimp! (exits), BEETLEJUICE: YOU'RE INVISIBLE WHEN YOU'RE ME, I VANISHED LIKE A CLOUD OF DIRTY HIPSTER VAPE, LYDIA: By the time you read this I, Lydia Deetz, will be gone there's nothing for me here I'm alone, forsaken, invisible. Alone. BEETLEJUICE: Oh yeah right! CHARLES: Do you hear that, Delia? (laughs.). DELIA: SHE IS A HURRICANE IN ALL KINDS OF WEATHER, LYDIA: MAMA IF YOU'RE LISTENING, DOESN'T THIS BLOW YOUR MIND, BUT SEEK A LITTLE STRANGER THAN USUAL AND YOU WILL FIND. ADAM: Well, hey I do not see any cops around here! I'M GONNA MAKE HIM SAY MY NAME, I'LL MAKE HIM SAY MY NAME (MAKE HIM SAY YOUR NAME). BEETLEJUICE: THAT IS THE SOUND, OF CLEAN, WHITE, SHORTS TURNING BROWN, LYDIA: THE SOUND OF A SCREAM, IS MUSIC TO ME, A SOUND THAT SAYS FIFTEEN YEARS FULL-TIME THERAPY, BEETLEJUICE: TRAUMA AND FEAR, IT SINGS IN MY EAR, BEETLEJUICE/LYDIA: AIN'T IT THE SWEETEST NOISE AROUND, THAT BEAUTIFUL SOUND. And she left us. Its a classic Victorian with the original crown molding. The new musical had originally been slated to end its run on June 6, but the show was . About Press Copyright Contact us Creators Advertise Developers Terms Privacy Policy & Safety How YouTube works Test new features Press Copyright Contact us Creators . LYDIA: What? After more than 30 years, Michael Keaton and Winona Ryder could potentially reprise their roles as Beetlejuice and Lydia Deetz in the upcoming film Beetlejuice 2.. Keaton and Ryder originally played the iconic characters in Tim Burton's 1998 cult classic Beetlejuice.. As reported by ScreenRant, Brad Pitt's production company Plan B Entertainment has signed on to produce Beetlejuice 2. Alex Brightman and Sophia Anne Caruso in "Beetlejuice." Matthew Murphy. Itty bitty price, more of a favor really. I gotta keep these two lovebirds here, with me so they can haunt their house Ahh! The script was . Before Juno sees you. Ive come to pry my beloved daughter from your cold dead hands. We cant just stay in the attic! LYDIA: I dont know how! ADAM: I know! Stripey Ghost Man? The Maitlands and Beetlejuice, Lydia thinks, can bring her to the netherworld to see her mother once more. Step 4: Select a monologue. It was all rundown and we didnt know if we were going to get through it. So kinda like this. LYDIA: I want you to stay. BEETLEJUICE/LYDIA: THE SOUND OF HEART EXPLODING INSIDE A CHEST, BEETLEJUICE/LYDIA: AIN'T IT THE SWEETEST NOISE IN TOWN, THAT BEAUTIFUL SOUND. Goes to the door. All of us! Synopsis: Beetlejuice, a malevolent spirit masquerading as a guide to the Netherworld meets the Maitlands, a recently deceased couple learning the ropes of haunting their own home. Do not be afraid. You are like ice! Thats why youre stuck in the attic! Beetlejuice the Musical - Prologue: Invisible Lyrics "Prologue: Invisible" is a song performed by Sophia Anne Caruso (Lydia) from the musical Beetlejuice. Now heres the problem. ADAM: Oh! MISS ARGENTINA: THIS IS THE NETHERWORLD! Oldest trick in the book! LYDIA: What? Because I dont think we can. BEETLEJUICE: Looks like we're not invisible anymore! Oh god, Im so worried now. Well be right back. I have some good news. I dont know what I did. Youre all going to die. We did find that out. Call 9-1-1! I designed it to reflect wealth, sophistication, and above all-. On stage, however, "Beetlejuice" stakes a convincing claim for itself and presents a case for how much just plain fun theater can be when it's done this well. But I swear to you, we will. 24m. By the time you read this, I will be gone, having jumped off . This is what you get! No one likes it, throw it out.. (LYDIA stabs him.) The man next to me ONE DAY YOU MAY WAKE UP ALONE, DELIA: 'CAUSE YOUR HUSBAND AND HIS BOYFRIEND BOUGHT A BOAT AND THEN THEY SAILED AWAY TO ROME, DELIA: SO YOU CRY YOURSELF TO SLEEP IN DEEP DESPAIR, TALKIN' TO THE WALLS 'CAUSE THERE'S NO ONE THERE, 'CAUSE THAT'S YOUR LAST CHANCE TO HAVE A FAMILY, THAT YOUR AGING ASS WILL HAVE TO BELIEVE THAT , A LITTLE "I AM STILL YOUNG!!!" Upgrade to PRO Second row, right there! Never change! Move forward. Love is love. Its the last day of their entire lives and this is what theyre talking about! youre getting really comfy with the whole being dead thing! Im the perfect person to help you battle your ghost. THIS CRIB IS TOO PRECIOUS FOR PLACING A BABY INSIDE IT, YOUR SENSE OF PERFECTION IS JUST A REFLECTION THAT, YOU ARE NOT MENTALLY PREPARED TO MAKE ROOM FOR A KID. howd you get her to marry you? Mom was the ghost of Edgar Allan Poe! He was fast! Welcome to MsMojo, and today we're counting down our picks for the Top 10 Dance Scenes in '80s Movies. She needs somebody to help her get past all this. LYDIA: Dad, how long do we have to stay here? CHARLES: OkayOtho! In her eyes, her ability to "gut" the house is connected to her ability to express, from which Charles is blocking her. ADAM: What other choice do we have? Mr. Juice, I respect your resistance and your Moxy. BEETLEJUICE: NO, WHAT FILLS YOU WITH RAGE? BEETLEJUICE: DON'T YOU WANNA SEE DAD SUFFER? One of the reasons Beetlejuice's Lydia is an icon is her style. Say Chuck, didnt you used to have a daughter? And yet, I worry. I don't know what just happened. (BEETLEJUICE bursts in on the Sandworm.). It was like the perfect dad joke! DELIA: And that is depressing. Wait! Based on the 1988 film starring Michael Keaton, the musical tells the story of Lydia Deetz, an offbeat teenager whose life changes when her family moves into a home inhabited by a recently . Having lost her. Playing hardball, huh? Not gonna do that. DELIA: No, I thought youd be proud of me for taking inititAHve. Im going to the Netherworld! BEETLEJUICE: So then, I was like Lets do this! Is this it? What an effervescent young lady you are. LYDIA: Dad! From an outfit standpoint, her clothes launched the mood boards of many goth girls. I cant see! I have something to say. Unless I am paid upfront in cash, and learned that the hard way. BEETLEJUICE: PRETTY MUCH, ANY GHOST'LL DO, SURE. BEETLEJUICE: Thats it! And he gave me this. I mean, no I have an idea, how about instead of impaling yourself on that birdbath, you uh, I dont know, say my name three times. Ah! Beetlejuice DC Script - Free download as PDF File (.pdf), Text File (.txt) or read online for free. Don't apologize! Give me just one more BEETLEJUICE: It's showtime! Sorry, I dont mean to bore you guys, talking about my mom. BEETLEJUICE: And now for the moment youve all been waiting for! I like to think I put my own spin on it, but whats the point, you know? [speaks in Lydia's voice] Beetlejuice: I'm Lydia Deetz and I'm of sound mind. All Ive gotta do is get a living person to say my name three times. BEETLEJUICE: Fine! Its-. You died together. BARBARA: So, now what? frowns at the MUSIC. Theres very good energy in here. What do I always say about doubt? Based on Tim Burton's blockbuster film of the same name, this animated show features Beetlejuice, the wildest ghost this side of the "Neitherworld" and his mortal best friend Lydia Deetz, a young, perky goth girl attending a private school in a sleepy little Connecticut town. It CLICKS OFF. A ballad already? You! Sophia Anne Caruso, who originated the role of Lydia Deetz in Broadway's Beetlejuice, has exited the production as of its Wednesday, Feb. 19 show. CHARLES: Wouldnt even know where to start. I think I really captured your essence. What am I doing? JUNO: You are the embarrassment. This is exciting! LYDIA: I dont know! Parts. Now, Im gonna go find a room to bless. Ive never felt this before. BEETLEJUICE: Boy, do you know how to pick em or what? Dad, no. OTHO: So glad that you asked. LYDIA: No, it was adorable. BEETLEJUICE: Why does everyone KEEP LEAVING ME! Beetlejuice Wiki is a FANDOM Movies Community. WE'RE MORE THAN DETRITUS WE'RE FINALLY ALIVE! Time. And if not, we're adding more every week so if you don't see one you like, keep checking back! So much poise! And I want everyone here to know it. Complimentary and Deeply Discounted Shows. I died with this sash. ADAM: Im confused, you can see us without the sheets. BEETLEJUICE Finished? You are dead. BEETLEJUICE: There you go, kid. I have been waiting for so long for you people to die, and now youre here and I just think were going to make such a great team, dont you? Lets get you finished! BEETLEJUICE: No, she did! BARBARA: Lydia, no, you don't know what will happen. Guy talk howd you do it? Barbara, the pig! DELIA: (aggressive.) Cmon! MAXIE DEAN: Oh, dont mind her. DELIA: Yeah! Its okay at Christmas, but the rest of the year, you gotta put it away! Which reminds me, I got you a new dress for your fathers business dinner! ADAM: What the heck did they do to our house? ), ADAM: Somebody do something! I can bring your daddy so much pain. Like a gay republican! Can I see? DELIA: Why does this always happen to me? Knock three times. BEETLEJUICE Oh, theyre both gonna get it. Im a part of this too! Why dont you have a handbook? AGHHHHHH! BEETLEJUICE: Babs, I get it, I totally get it, but the two of you are special. FORESHADOWING. BARBARA: Adam, thats not why she doesnt like it here. I have a chance to see her again, please! Except for you, Dead Mom. . Seeking 2 Actor Team for Spring BARBARA: You were right. Teen And Up Audiences. AH AH AH! DELIA: Lydia, look, I know that youre upset, but maybe this is meant to be. Based on his/her attributes, we recommend you consider these audition pieces! You see, the living ignore the dead. This sappy subplot robs the musical of macabre and fits the story as well as O.J.'s glove. TAKE YOUR PLACES I WANT SCARY FACES NOW GO! Fun at parties! BEETLEJUICE: Pepperoni, mushrooms and snakes! Thats great! Let's haunt this bitch! GET OUTTA MY WAY. Yes, Beetlejuice, THE MUSICAL, which opened on the Great White Way on April 25, 2019 and closed, due to the COVID-19 pandemic on March 10, 2020, and reopened on April 8, 2022 permanently closed . NOW LETS SKIP THE TEARS AND START ON THE WHOLE YOU KNOW, AND IF I HEAR YOUR CELL PHONE RINGING, ILL KILL YOU MYSELF, BEETLEJUICE: YOURE, YOURE GONNA BE FINE, DIE, YOURE ALL GONNA DIE, YOURE ALL GONNA DIE, YEAH, I KNOW YOURE WOKE, BUT YOU CAN TAKE A JOKE HERE, AND EVERY SHOW I DO LIKE A TON OF COKE HERE, BEETLEJUICE: YOU'RE YOU'RE GONNA BE FINE, ENSEMBLE: DEATH IS TABOO, BUT IT'S HARDLY SOMETHING NEW, THERE'S NOTHING MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS CAN DO, BEETLEJUICE IF YOU DIE WHILE WATCHING THIS PERFORMANCE, THE SHOW WILL NOT STOP, AND ON A CERTAIN DATE, THE UNIVERSE KILLS YOU, SO, HOW BOUT WE ALL MAKE A START (DIES IRAE! Im just saying its not stupid. Girl, just say it three times in a row. BEETLEJUICE: You heard the lady! YEAH! MAXINE: OH STOP! (THE MAITLANDS nod.) The Tony-nominated smash Beetlejuice played its final performance on March 11 at the Winter Garden Theatre. LYDIA: (to CHARLES.) Well that was a soliloquy, so you're the one who's being rude. (to audience.) Once he realizes this house is haunted, well have to leave! Its like a nursing home for sad cats. BEETLEJUICE: And I know that now. Well, we can take care of that. It's a gold mine! BEETLEJUICE: Well then, go fuck yourself. who adapted the movie into the musical's script, . You and me, were not that different. LYDIA: A SOUND THAT MEANS NO MORE CONDESCENDING ADULTS HANGING AROUND, BEETLEJUICE/LYDIA: EACH WAIL AND EACH MOAN. Yes, its been very creepy. People! Once Im dead, my dad will be sorry! I was in a sweat lodge. Beetlejuice The Musical is rumoured to open in London's West End in Spring 2023. JUNO: My name is Juno! This house is actually pretty interesting. BARBARA Oh, honey. Powerless. There are people downstairs. DELIA: Wait, Charles, are you breaking up with me? It's just like you said, you dont always get it, but youre a part of it. About the future. Anthony King LYDIA: Yeah, you look like a bloated zebra that a lion ripped apart and then didnt eat because there was obviously something wrong with it, so it just rotted in the hot African sun. Its finally time for you two to go to the Netherworld! LYDIA: I had a change of heart. It will play its final show at the Marquis Theater on Jan. 8, 2023. So, Im selling our house. Maybe Ive been all wrong about you. BEETLEJUICES: ALL WE WANNA DO IS HEAR THAT SOUND. C'MON, DROP YOUR PANTIES I'M TRYING TO FILL YA, WITH WISDOM AND SKILL AND THE INSTINCT TO KILL. LYDIA: I dont want your help. Thats a neat trick. Wheres your handbook? Musical of macabre and fits the story as Well as O.J. & x27... Music and lyrics by Eddie perfect, Lydia thinks, can bring her to the netherworld to her... And beetlejuice, it doesnt matter if you say it adam, thats not why she doesnt like it.... Your house to me beetlejuice & # x27 ; m Lydia Deetz and I & # x27 ; s is! 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